Broken Pieces
by pamy
Summary: AU Fifteen years after the murder of their mother siblings Rick and Martha return to Summer Bay to discover the truth about what happened. On their journey they will find love friendship and a truth that will shatter them full summary inside. Rewrite.
1. Prologue

**I posted this story on a while ago, but mid way trough the story I got a bad case of writing block and never finished it. Having found my notes on how I the story was supposed to develop I've decided to take it up again. But I've started again from the beginning, rewriting what I already had. For those of you that read the first part of this story on backtothebay, the story itself is still practically the same. **

**I own nothing. **

**Summary: **Fifteen years ago Martha and Ric's mother was murdered and her father was sent to jail. Now they return to Summer Bay to discover the truth about what happened that night. With the help of Roy they discover the cover up and the lies that may end up destroying the new live they have built. But Summer Bay holds many secrets and troubles and before they know it they find themselves sucked into the strange world of the seaside town. Ric finds himself in the middle of the turbelent relationship of Matilda and Luke, which may end in tragedy and Martha falls for Jack, the man who without knowing it may hold the key to unravel the mystery of the death of her mother and a friendship, that of Robbie and Jack, so beyond repair that it seems like nothing could fix it. But somewhere a man sits in a jail cell waiting for the truth to out...

**couples: **Jack/Martha, Robbie/Tasha, Luke/Matilda, Rick/Matilda

**Disclaimer for whole story: **I do not own, if I did neither Noah nor Jack would have ever died.

* * *

**Prologue**

There had been a full moon that night.

The same night he decided to set his plan in motion, a plan that will in the end destroy himself; off that he is sure. When he finally sets out night has already set and the streets are deserted. He pretends like he's just going out for a walk, so that if in the off chance that he runs into someone, nobody will pay him a second glance. He wants to be forgettable to those that see him, he is after all walking a different path; one wrong step in the wrong direction and his whole world will fall apart.

Still he knows what he must do.

He does not, will not, dwell on it; he refuses to spend any more time running it over in his head, what has to be done will be done. She is the one who has does this to him, with all of her lies and secrets, he has driven him to this point, and now she must pay for it. She has driven him crazy and this is his only way out, the only way he can survive. Slowly and silently he creeps to the darkness and stops right in front of his destination, the beautiful houses are bathed in darkness and this one is no different.

The house is silent, nobody is awake anymore.

He picks up the pace then, so that nobody pays any attention to him; he wants to be out of the open fast, on the off chance that one of the neighbors will look outside. After all if only one person sees him, and recognizes him, his entire plan would fall apart; the plan that has consumed him for the better part of the last year. She has to pay, pay for what she has done to him; and to come this close and then fail is unacceptable. The door opens quietly, there is no need to break in for he still has his key, and he prays that nobody will be awaken by the closing of the door. For a second his hand lingered over the switch that will turn on the light, but he decides to leave the house bathed in darkness; after all he does not wish to wake up the children, after all they should not be harmed, all he wants is her.

He makes sure not to touch anything, nor disturb anything in the house, so that nobody will ever now that he was there. If his plan goes well tomorrow she will be dead and they both will pay for her mistakes, for what they had done to him. Praying that the stairs don't crack under his feet he silently makes his way of the stairs. He knows which room he has to be in, he has after all been here before in happier time; but he pauses at the first door he comes across.

He almost, almost, turns around and goes back home.

Inside this room a young baby boy is fast asleep, he is barely a year old, and this is why he almost changes his mind. He does not want to cause this boy, nor the girl in the next room, any harm. They are the only true innocents after all and they will pay for the mistakes of those around them. He is almost sure that the boy is his son and now he will never know, if he takes this path nobody must ever know that it could be his son. He has made his choices and he will also pay a price, this will probably be the closest he will ever be to the boy, to the one who's probably his third son. He reaches out and with one last glance at the sleeping boy slowly closes the door.

What comes next should never be heard by any child.

In the next bedroom, three doors to the right, a young girl sleeps, just six years old. She would be old enough to remember her mother, old enough to understand what had happened; but she would not be old enough to understand her mother's cruelty, she is as of now just an innocent child. She, who will remember it all, will suffer more than her younger brother, but he doesn't pause for her either. He closes that door as well; the children should not hear they should not be scared; they shouldn't be hurt worse than they already will be.

Two more doors and then he walks through the open door on his right.

Now there truly is no turning around, now it must just be done; the choice to punish her was made a long time ago and now he will truly do it. Before this moment he could still turn around, before he could still have pretended he was never here. He watches her sleep for a second, she is beautiful even then, it's really no wonder he fell in love with her. He had only wanted her to live him but she never had, she had pretended and betrayed him, and her lies had brought you to this moment. The moment where you sit down on the bed next to her, careful to not wake her and places a soft kiss on her long hair, then he grabs the gun that his friend, her husband, always kept in the closet.

With a whisper of 'I love you' he finally bids her farewell.

Then very fast, before he can hesitate and change his mind, he places the barrel of the gun against her head and pulls the trigger. She never even woke up and in all probability never suffered as well, but she was dead, there is no doubt about it. It takes him a few minutes before he can accept what has happened and then he slowly gets up and walks away, leaving the gun lying on the bed. There are no fingerprints on it, but since it is her husbands the police will assume he did it.

He stops one last time at his son's door.

This is the last time he will ever be close to him, he will let him live his own live; never search for him, never claim him. This will be his punishment for what he has done, he knows he'll go to hell, but he also knows she will be there waiting for him. He doesn't open the door to his son's room instead he turns to the stairs and slowly walks out of the house one last time.

He walked into the house an innocent man but when he walks out he is guilty, his hands are now covered in his blood.

But nobody will ever know and the man disappears into the darkness around him.

As if he was never actually there.

She thinks it is her father's scream that woke her up.

Or maybe it was her brother crying, she's never quite sure what came first. All six year old Martha knew in that moment was that she was awake and she had no idea what was happening. Her father was screaming, like he was in some serious pain, but she could not hear her mother, and this she found the strangest. Slowly and terrified of what she will find outside she gets out of her bed. At her door she hesitates, what should she do first? Should she turn to her father or her brother? But it's her brother who needs her the most so she goes to his room and not her parent's.

It is a choice she will be grateful for, for the rest of her life.

She is not old enough to take the boy out of his crib, too small to reach over; but she hopes that her voice singing a lullaby will be enough to calm him down, at least until one of her parents come. As she softly sang the song his crying seized, and slowly she began to realize that there were other sounds as well; voices, sirens and in the background her father is still screaming. She's scared and unsure of what is happening she curls up next to the crib and looks around; that's when her eyes land on the small golden ring lying on the floor. Never will she actually understand why she did it, put she picked it up and put it in her pocket.

She never thinks about it, she is just a child after all.

She feels like an eternity passes before the door opens and her father stops screaming, but in reality it was only a few minutes; now she hears people run up the stairs and past her room. They never stop long enough to look in and see her sitting on the floor, then she realizes that despite the fact that her father has stopped screaming she can still hear him, now he is crying; and this scares her more than the screaming ever did. Then after a few more minutes, which seem like another eternity, the door opens and a young man walks in and slowly crouches down in front of her.

He introduces himself as Roy and promises that everything will be alright.

She needs not be scared and all she needs to do is go with him, he's a police officer and he will make sure everything is alright. She asks what is happening, she asks for her parents; but he just repeats that everything will be alright despite the obvious sadness in his eyes. Can my brother come too, she asks and Roy just smiles at her, of course he can. She hadn't seen her father arrive until Roy took notice of him, the words this will be the best, let them come with me just confuse her, especially since her father does not argue. But he's still crying and that scares her, because her father is strong and never cries, but he was and she did not understand why.

He promises he will explain everything later.

Softly he kisses her hair and tells her he loves her, he picks up the baby and kisses him as well; then he hands him over to Roy, who takes her hand and leads her out of the house. Before she leaves, before she's gone, she turns around one last time to see her father standing there in the same place she had left him.

It will be the last time she sees him.


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter **1

**Fifteen years later**

_First there is silence. _

_That's all there always is at first and for an instant she'll think she's safe, just for a second, then sound will break the silence and everything will change. First there is the crying, the very distant crying of a young baby, then there are the screams. And she wants to ignore it, just curl back in her bed and forget it, but she cannot. Slowly she gets back up and opens the door and in an instant she knows where she is, even though she has not been in this place for years, it was the place she called home for the first six years of her live. She wants to walk towards the crying but her legs guide her towards the screaming instead, she doesn't want to go there but she does anyway. Then she opens the door. _

_The world around her changes. _

_Then she finds herself standing on a cemetery in front of a single grave stone; her mother's grave. The screaming has finally stopped but the crying has not and then she finally realizes, she is the one who's crying. Then, like in other dreams, the world changes as well and there is a man right next to her and she takes the hand he offers her and then there is her father, hands covered in blood, smiling at her. A voice – s o much like her own - loudly speaks the word guilty. And he raises his gun and points it at her, the gunshots shatters the newfound silence…._

Martha screams as she sits up in her bed and it takes her a moment to remember where she is. Then she remembers she is in her house, her own house, not in Summer Bay, not in the place where her whole world changed. She is safe and he is in jail, there where he can never get to her. Fifteen long years have passed since that fateful moment but the nightmares have never truly disappeared, eventually she calms down enough to look at the clock. Unable to go back to sleep, despite the hour, she gets up and makes her way silently trough the small house.

Here she has been living since she turned 18, her hands are still shaking but she knows that in time they too will stop. She opens the room at the other side of hers to reveal a sleeping Rick, the sight of her little brother sleeping peacefully calmed her down inmensely. Without waking him up, what would be the good in them both being awake after all, she closes the door again. And she envies him, for the fact that he was too young to remember, for the fact that he never heard the screams. She is scarred by that night, destroyed by what she knows and she's not sure what has harmed her worse. The murder of her mother, whom she had loved so much, or the knowledge that it was her own father who murdered her.

She supposes it is a little bit of both.

Rick, unlike his older sister, is not plagued by nightmares at night. But that does not mean he isn't scarred by the event of that night or traumatized by what he knows. The murder of his mother has always made him different from his friends; the fact that his father murdered her turned his world upside down the day he found out. Sometimes he thinks about it, that fateful night, he tries not to but the memories plague. He unlike his sister has never known either of them and he never will, but sometimes in the depth of night he thinks he can remember her voice, singing to him; singing a long forgotten lullaby. But that may just be a dream.

Most likely it's Martha's voice he remembers, but he wishes it was his mother's, he pretends it's his mothers. Martha tried to tell him about her and though he's grateful for the stories she tells he wishes he could have some of his own. It is after all not to same to hear others talk about her, it would be better to remember her. Sometimes, though he does not tell Martha, he wonders about his father as well, about the kind of man he was. Had he been a good man? Did Rick in any way resemble him? He never asks Martha, after all it will probably only hurt her.

It's not that he wants to meet the man or that he in any way thinks he is innocent, he knows what he has done, and Rick, nor Martha, will ever forgive him for taking their mother away. Never. But it does not mean that he never wonders about the man and how he had been before that night, before he murdered her, before he pulled the trigger. He doesn't remember anything about him either and at times he wonders what had driven his father to murder his mother. Had she done something to deserve it? Had they?

He lost them both in one night before ever truly meeting them and he can't figure out what hurts the most.

The murder of his mother or the betrayal of his father.

Jack Holden does not ask much of live.

He really doesn't, he's always had it all after all: a beautiful house, great clothes, fast cars and a lot of money. But those are the things his father had given him and sometimes he wishes he hadn't, because despite all of his gifts his father never actually looked nor talked to him. He never spends longer than a few minutes a day with his oldest son. Jack has long since accepted that this is his live and that he cannot change it, but it doesn't mean he has to like it. He has never understood why his father acted like that nor what he did wrong and in a way he realizes that that thought is ridiculous, because what can a child have done to make his father act that way?

The truth is Tony is not a really bad father, he's a great father to Luke, but not to him. Jack thinks it has all to do with his mother that he just reminds his father to much of her, but that isn't his fault either. He just wants his father to love him, is that so wrong? In a way Jack supposes he's made it hard for himself as well, after all, all his father had expected what for him to go and work at the family firm and be like him, as the oldest son it was his destiny almost. But he chose a different path, he chose to become a cop, the one thing he knew his father would hate the most and anger was one of the only emotions Jack could truly get out of Tony Holden.

Sometimes he wonders if his father is proud of him, even if it is just a tiny part.

Lately the only thing on his father's mind is marrying him off, but he has long since told his father that it will not work. He will not marry a rich young girl that only wants money and convinces him to leave the job he loves behind. He will not give up on his own dreams and live his father's; he will live his live the way he wants to live it. He knows there is a girl out there for him, a beautiful and brave girl who's not afraid to go for what she wants. A girl that will never force him to be something he is not.

There is a girl out there for him to fall in love with; he simply hasn't found her yet.

Matilda's eyes rested on the picture of them, taken less than a year ago and she smiles at who they were back then and how much they had loved each other. But it was just a picture, a frozen moment somewhere in time, and she can see what she wants in it. But she remembers how it was back then, when Luke was still the boy he had always been, when he had truly loved her, back when he had still been close friends with Henry. She's sure he still loves her, but somehow everything is different now and so is he. Or maybe he has always been like this, maybe she is the one who changes, maybe she imagined the boy he had once been.

Back then everything had seemed so clear and nice to her, the rush of her first love, the feelings developing deep inside of her. She's just sixteen but she had felt she had found the one, the one she could love forever. She thought they would never change that everything would always be the same; in some ways she supposes it was childish and stupid, she was like many others. But everything had changed; nothing after all stays the same.

It all started when he made new friends, the boys who had started school only six months ago; that's when Luke slowly began to change. Of course she hadn't noticed it back then, she wouldn't notice until he was someone else, until Henry pointed out to her that he was different, until Henry stopped being his friend. By the time she realized he was the polar opposite of the boy she had loved, yet at times he can still act like him, maybe she's just imagining it after all. Maybe she's going crazy.

Luke is changing, pulling away from her and becoming someone else, and Matilda doesn't like the man he is turning into.

Martha has always wondered about that night, been haunted by it; when she was younger, much younger, she preferred to forget that night had ever happened. Mostly because at first she could not understand what was happening, no matter how hard Roy had tried to explain it to her. Even now after so many years they are still close, exchange Christmas cards, call every now and then. She knows the man who saved her that night better than she knows her own father, better than she will ever know her father.

But as she grew older the night begins to resurface and slowly the understanding of what her father had done dawned on her. She now knew what had happened but she could still not understand it, nobody probably could. Why had he done it? The little she remembered of her father, the man in her memories, could not be meshed with the man who had so coldly murdered his wife, the mother of his children, while those same children slept in just a few feet away. But in the end she had just been six, perhaps she could simply not remember him well.

At times she wonders why he screamed, why he bothered; was it a way to convince the world he hadn't done it? But how could he convince the world someone else had done it, after all the only two other people in the house were too small to be able to tell something. The only thing he had accomplished with his screaming was scaring his little girl more. There are times, when she was younger, that she almost believed he was innocent; an act she thinks is normal, for what child wants to believe their father murdered their mother? She wanted to believe they had made a mistake that her father was not the monster they painted him out to be, but of course he was.

It was just a fantasy of a girl who had lost both her parents.

She knows the truth of what he has done but a lot of questions still remain. The main one was why, she could go and ask him but she truly has no desire to see the man who robbed her of her own mother, but she still needs the answers. Know so that she can finally move on, accept what had happened and move on. The other main question, beside the way and the screaming, is the ring in her hand.

She had never shown it to anyone and she had no idea who it belonged to, at least she doesn't think it's her mothers. She doesn't remember it; though it still might be, but if it isn't her mother's nor her father's whose was it? Who had dropped the ring, just at the door of her brother's room? Was there perhaps someone else in the house that night? She shakes her head, unlikely, most likely it belonged to a friend of her parents who had lost it when they visited her baby brother; maybe it belonged to the baby sitter.

She needed answers, the smiling picture of her mother on the nightstand while holding her little girl catches her eyes and a sad smile appears on her face.

Perhaps she'll find those answers in Summer Bay….


	3. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

The smell of eggs and bacon fills the small house.

Rick slowly opens his eyes, one look at the clock tells him it's too early for most people to actually be awake on a Sunday Morning, but neither he nor Martha were normal people. Always different, haunted by what had happened so many years ago. Rick knows why Martha is always up so early, even though she never speaks of it, it's those nightmares, he knows because sometimes he hears her scream, they used to scare him, but now he has grown used to it. Which might not be such a good thing.

They never speak of it, she never tells him and he doesn't want to let her know he knows, if she doesn't wish to speak of it he will not make her. He has always known she has spent most of her live protecting him, like he will always try to protect her; he wants to tell her she doesn't need to, that just because she's the oldest one doesn't mean she has to protect him from everything. Because sometimes he's sure she also needs a shoulder to lean on, someone to listen to her and he hopes she knows he is always there, no matter what.

They will help each other through everything because they were all they had.

Martha hears him before she sees him, like every other morning.

She puts the eggs on a plate and turns around, he still looks like he's half asleep; and for a second she feels guilty, sure she woke him up. Perhaps the not sleeping much runs in the family or perhaps it's what happened so many years ago, she supposes it doesn't matter. In a way it might just be so that they can always have breakfast together, no matter what; that that is why they always wake up early and together. As he sits down he realizes that she is looking at him nervously, he knows that look, it means she wants to tell him something but is not sure how. He looks around the room, trying to determine what is happening, when his eyes land on the suitcase. He begins using his brain – not easily done this early in the morning – to try and remember. Was she going somewhere? Did she tell him and had he just forgotten – it's not like it would be the first time – or are they perhaps going somewhere?

'_We going somewhere sis?'_

'_No, I am. Rick I need you to listen to me, I'm not really sure how to explain it.' _Pausing for a second she nervously meets his eyes and he smiles at her trying to reassure her she can tell him anything. _'I'm going to go back to Summer Bay, I've been thinking about doing that for a while. I know it's hard to understand but I want to go and visit Roy. To find out what happened that night, to find the answers to my questions. There are things I need to know, things I need to understand. And I have this feeling that I'm only going to find this in Summer Bay. But you don't have to come with me, I need to know this but I understand if you don't want to know, if you don't want to understand. So I'm going to go and I promise you I will not be gone long, I'll be back before you can actually miss me. I'm not leaving, you behind, I promise.' _

The silence stretches out for a few minutes while Rick focuses on his eggs before he finally speaks.

'_I'm going with you. Look I know you are doing your best to protect you, but we have always been together no matter what. I know what you are going to say, that you won't be long that it won't matter, but that's not true. And you don't know how long this might take or what you might find, but I don't want you to be alone when you find your answers. And you know what Mac, I need those answers, I need to know what happened, why it happened. So I'm going with you no matter where you go.' _

'_Well you should probably pack then. Thanks little brother.'_

Martha sighs in relief, she had not truly wanted to go alone; but she didn't want to make him go with her, she didn't want him to ask him to face things he perhaps did not want to face. As Rick packs his bag, which takes the rest of the morning, he lingers on an old picture of his mom. He didn't tell Martha that despite what had happened there he wanted to see Summer Bay, to walk on that beach, to live in her town, even if it's only a few weeks. To live in the place his mother had once called home, to finally feel connected to him.

It's always the same scenario.

At least, Tasha gratefully thinks, they never actually seek each other out. She's never understood why they hate each other, what had happened to destroy the friendship they had once had. She thinks that if they would just stop and sit down to talk to each other that everything will be alright. But for some reason – and perhaps she is just too female to identify it – they hate each other. Whatever happened, happened before; before she came to Summer Bay.

They don't seek each other out but when they meet it's always the same; one of them says something (usually Robbie) the other answer back. And before she knows it – before anyone truly sees it coming – they are arguing. Screaming at each other, though it rarely (if ever) goes physical, as for a real fight she's only seen it twice. But that had been a long time ago and, if she remembers it correctly, they both ended up in the hospital. It might have been hilarious if it wasn't so ridiculous, sometimes she just wants to shake them and ask them what had happened, what had destroyed them, but she never does.

Now someone always breaks it up before it gets violent, though over time these confrontations have happened less and less, and now they mostly ignore each other. At least she never has to step in and for that she is grateful. Because she is literally caught in the middle and she doesn't know how to change it, Jack has been her best friend (her brother) for years; but she had had a crush on Robbie for almost as long. She doesn't understand why they can't go on, they are after all so much like each other. At least they stopped asking her how she can be friends with both.

Her own feelings are the worst, Jack was like her brother, but her feelings for Robbie were almost as strong. She knows she is blushing when he looks at her, she stumbles over her words and her heart beets faster than it should. She knows she is completely and totally head over heels in love with him, but she doesn't act on it. She doesn't want to lose Jack, she can't tell him she's in love with the guy he had once warned her about, and since she doesn't know what happened she doesn't understand why.

It doesn't really matter, it's not like he has feelings for her.

In the end it is easier to forgive your enemies then it is to forgive your friends.

Whoever had said that was, in Jack's mind at least, a genius; for truer words were never spoken. There are times he thinks he can forgive Robbie, after all many years have passed; but maybe that is part of the problem. That so many years have passed since they drifted apart, since their friendship was destroyed; now they are so far from who they had once been that perhaps they simply can't go back anymore. Sometimes he thinks it doesn't matter other times he thinks he should forgive him anyway.

But he knows he can't and he knows Tasha doesn't understand, he didn't want to talk about it back then and she has stopped asking since then. He can't find the right words to explain what had happened, to explain where they went wrong. How it was that they – who had once been so close friends, practically brothers – managed to drift so far away from each other that nobody could remember who they had once been. He prefers not to think about the Robbie he had once known, the one he thought had been his friend, maybe he never was that man, maybe he was. He'll never know.

There is a fine line between love – friendship – and hate, another genius speaking.

But once you cross that line you can never go back, you can only go on.

Matilda doesn't like this, though she is unsure what this is exactly.

Luke has changed into something that frightens her, yet she's not sure what it is he has become. Maybe that is what why she stayed with him, maybe that's why she's still with him; she knows she loves him – at least she thinks it's love – but she's not even sure. She had thought that a girl talk with Cassie might help her, but somehow she had – unintentionally – made everything worse. She's sure they didn't have plan, she even left him a message on his phone; so he wouldn't go and look for her, because she had made her own plans. When she meets him later on the beach she smiles at him and he just smiles back and Matilda, for a brief instant, thinks she imagined the change, he still looks the same after all. Maybe it's all in her head and then he asks her if she wants to hang out and she tells him she can't.

When she'll think about it later she'll know that was her mistake, she should have said 'I have plans' not 'I can't'; she should have told him she left him a message. She knows it came out wrong and that it was her fault she made him angry. Which means – logically – that everything that came after that was her fault as well and not his; he got angry – of course he got angry – after all she was practically telling him she didn't want to spend time with him. And she ignores the small voice in the back of her mind, the one that tells her it's not her fault; that no matter what he should not have gotten that angry, that she was not his property. That she can do with her time what she wants.

'_What do you mean you can't?' _Calm at first, collected, like he's just trying to understand what was happening. _'I already made plans; I'm going shopping with Cassie.' _There's silence first, and for a second Matilda thinks he accepts this, that he understands. Instead he raises his voice.

She'll never truly know what he said, she's not even sure if he knows what he said, but the point was clear. That she shouldn't be spending so much time with her friends instead of him that he had never liked Cassie; that Cassie was somehow – and Matilda has no idea how he came to this conclusion – turning her against him. And all that goes through her head in that moment is _who is this? This is not Luke, it cannot be, and it can't be the same boy she had loved for so many years. _She wants to answer, tell him she doesn't like his friends either, but she's afraid – though in time she'll deny it – and so she holds her silence.

Instead she turned around as she did not think talking would help the situation and began to walk away; perhaps he just needed some time to calm down. He grabbed her arm roughly and turned her to face him his anger evident. _'Where do you think you are going? I am talking to you!' _Matilda takes a deep breath, determined to stay calm herself, determined to make sure her voice is not shaking when she finally speaks. _'I already told you, I have plans with Cassie. Let go of me Luke.' _He doesn't, he keeps talking and talking and he never lets go of her arm.

'_Damn it Luke let go of me! You're hurting me, let go!'_

In an instant she was free; he'd dropped her arm as if it electrocuted him. The silence that followed was heave and after a few seconds Matilda turns around and runs away from him.

Luke stands there and just watches her go.

If there's one think Jack hates its being the new guy.

And though he loves his job he absolutely hates he's the new one, he's the one they leave behind to answer the phone, the one who gets the jobs nobody else wants to do. He likes the boss – partner? He's never really sure about that one, not enough cops to figure it out, not that it matters – but he hates being the new guy. But has to get through it, it's not like it will last forever, at some point somebody else will show up and they will be the new one and he can move on. That moment can't come fast enough.

But until that time comes here he is, staring at the phones, the phones that Roy left him in charge of, the ones that hardly ever ring. It's just a small town it's not like there is a lot of crime, it's at these moments that he's incredibly grateful neither his brother nor his father truly take an interest in his jobs. He has no desire eto tell them that instead of going around catching criminals, he is left behind to babysit the phones of all things. He hopes they'll ring soon before he goes crazy and he thinks somebody up there must really be smiling down at him because finally the phone rings.

'_Summer Bay Police Station, Constable Holden speaking, how can I help you?' _ Please be important, please be something important and for the love of God, please take a long time to explain.

'_Good afternoon sir, I'm trying to contact Roy.' _

'_Detective Hanson is not here at the moment.' _

'_When is he coming back?' _

'_I'm not really sure; would you like to leave a message? I'm sure he'll call you back as soon as he's back.' _

'_Of course, just tell him Martha called and would like him to call her back, as soon as possible please.'_

'_Martha and your last name?'_

'_He knows who I am; could you just tell him to call me?'_

'_Of course, have a nice day Martha.'_

'_Have a nice day Constable Holden.' _

Then the line goes dead, he takes a few second to write the message down and leave it on Roy's desk, then he goes back to the phones. But he can't forget about the girl, most likely because he had nothing to do, he wondered who she was. Perhaps she was a girlfriend or an old friend, he can't quite tell, he doesn't really know Roy that well yet, the fault of being the new guy.

Maybe in time he too will find out.

It is the silence he misses the most in the end.

He has almost forgotten what that feels like, complete silence; because in jail it is never silent, there is always some kind of sound. Prisoners that scream, guards walking by, locks that are closed, but it's never silent. That is what he misses the most, other inmate's talk more about the darkness; that is in the end another reality about jail, it is never completely dark, there's always some kind of light; but he's not completely sure why that is.

He doesn't miss the darkness, probably because no matter how much light it is once you close your eyes there is always complete darkness, he misses the silence. He's been here for fifteen long years and still he has not gotten used to it and it still bothers him, what bothers him more however is the fact that he can't really remember. He can' remember what the silence feels like, it's like every day that passes him by he forgets more and more about the outside world and that scares him.

What he misses the most – more than silence and the freedom – are his children, his eyes wonder to the only picture on his wall, the only one he has. It's an old picture, tears shine in his eyes as he looks at his wife – his beautiful wife, so full of life, her too he misses but she unlike his children is never coming back – with her arms around his daughter, his beautiful Martha while Rick lies in the sand next to them. He knows his two only children hate him, they hate him for what they think he has done, and he doesn't really blame them, there are times he hates himself as well.

But the most important thing, the only thing he knows for sure, is that he did not do it, he did not murder his wife. He remembers that day as clearly as if it happened yesterday. He'd walked up to his room – it felt weird somehow, as if he knew something wasn't right, as if he could sense that something in the house wasn't right – and he found her there, lying on the bed and for a second it seemed as if she was just sleeping, but she wasn't. He can't remember when he started screaming, but he knows he did and somewhere he heard his son cry but he couldn't move. He didn't move until they told him that she was really dead then he thought of his children.

He'll never forget the look on Martha's face, so scared and confused; too young to understand what was happening. He remembered watching as the police officer, carrying his son took her hand and slowly led her out of the house; and in that moment he had been grateful to the unnamed man, who he never actually saw again. She turned around once more and looked at him and then she turned around, she never came here, not that he thought she would and neither did he. To them he knows he's as good as dead and in no way does he actually blame them.

But somewhere out there, hiding in the shadows for the past fifteen years, the true killer is still lose. And all those years he has lived his live, a live he stole from his beautiful wife, a live he stole from him and a live he had stolen from his children. Someday he'll find him, someday he'll get out of here and he'll make him pay for what he did to him, someday he will have his revenge. Over the years locked in this prison he has made many friends and many will help him find out the truth and make him pay for everything he did.

He has nothing left to lose after all.

The drive to their destination is made in complete silence.

Neither spoke a word, neither actually wanted to talk; even if they had wanted to what could they say? The path they're about to walk won't be an easy one, finding out what happened might do them more harm than good, but they need to know. They're going to dig into a past that might be better if it stayed hidden, but they need to know what happened.

_Welcome to Summer Bay. _

Martha drives pas the sign without truly looking at it, it has been a long time since she's been here. The last time she drove past this same sign she was leaving, not coming, and she had only been a child then; unaware of what she was leaving behind. She keeps driving until she reaches the small diner and since they have been driving for so long Martha thinks some foot will do them good and then they need to find a place to stay.

As she gets out of the car her eyes land on the vast ocean and for the first time in years she feels something else, like she's finally come home. Like finally, after so many years, she was where she always should have been.


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Summer Bay.

He'd spend so many years trying to imagine what the little sea-side town would be like and somehow he had always expected it to be magical. Maybe it was because it was the only real connection he had to his mother, he has the stories but even a six year old doesn't have that many stories and pictures only freeze a moment, they don't tell that much at all. He used to spend his time staring at the pictures and inventing stories, repeating them so many times that after a while it seemed like they had really happened.

But most important was the imagining of Summer Bay.

The sea and the beach he is now staring at, after fifteen years he's finally made it; the last place his mother had actually lived, the only town she had ever lived in, at least as far as he knows. Sometimes it seems strange that they didn't come back before, even if just to see the sea, Martha must have after all had some friends here. Their entire family, which didn't have that much members left, lived close by, but the reasons why didn't matter, they hadn't returned until now.

Martha had never really wanted to come back.

He didn't want to come back either, at least not for many years, there were just too many feelings left, to many horrors. Too many things they wanted to forget, all those questions that were never answered; the same questions they were now attempting to answer. Rick wants, no Rick needs to know; but even though he does need the answers another part of him wants to run away and never look back. He doesn't want to understand his father, doesn't want to hear the things he's going to hear.

He needs the answers to his questions, but he's afraid of them as well.

Divide and conquer that was their Moto.

Or at least that was the idea, they'd split up trying to accomplish more in one day; Martha would go to the police station and talk to Roy, Rick would find them a place to stay. It's not that Rick didn't wish to go with Martha but he had never really known this guy, never felt connected to him the way Martha had. Roy had spent his time during the case and the trial protecting her and they'd stayed friends for many years so it only seemed normal that she'd go and talk to him.

Rick knows he'd just feel uncomfortable.

So in the end it's much easier – much, much easier – for her to talk to Roy and for him to find a place to stay, at least that's what he had believed, an hour ago. You would think – _you'd really think _– that there is no way you could actually get lost in a town this small and yet that appears to be what he has done. Everything just looks the same here and he's pretty sure he's just spend all of his time going around in circles and somehow he always finds his way to the beach, but he has no idea where he is.

Eventually, after walking around for an hour, he asked for help.

Martha would have rolled her eyes ages ago and said 'Boy's, she would have wondered out loud why it was that boy never asked for directions. But Rick just feels stupid and ridiculous asking for direction to the caravan park in a town this small, especially when the man he asks just point towards the way he was walking and said '_Just keep going straight ahead, five more minutes and you'll see the sign.' _At least he didn't laugh and he figures he's not the first problem who has found himself lost or maybe the man was just too polite to laugh in his face.

He really, really should have gone with Martha.

Matilda tried to forget what happened on the beach.

It's not like Luke had really hurt her, not really anyway; but it wasn't that, it was more the fact that he had actually grabbed her arm. As if it was his intention to drag her to wherever he wanted to go, to get some degree of control over her; as if he, and only he, could decide where she would go next. She'd run home without stopping and, so far, hadn't told anyone, not her best friend, nor her brothers.

It seemed like just a small and stupid thing and she didn't want to make a big deal out of it.

Maybe she's just making a big deal out of nothing, that's what it was, nothing. She had looked him in the eye when he took her arm and she hadn't seen that much anger, or maybe she was just deceiving herself, he had probably not realized he was holding her arm that tightly, he had not meant to hurt her. He was still her Luke, the one she fell in love with.

A soft knock on her door brings her back to earth.

Slowly she gets up of the couch, unsure if she should open the door, maybe its Luke coming to apologize or hurt her. But it isn't, it's someone else, someone she has never seen before. It takes her a moment – _a long embarrassing moment _– to realize why there is a stranger standing at her door, and then finally her brain – _her stupid and slow brain –_ finally kicks in and she remembers that she lives in a Caravan Park. People might actually come by and rent one, sure it doesn't happen very often, but it might occasionally happen. _Suddenly she wonders how it is possible that after so many years they are still running, with the small amount of costumers they get they should have gone bankrupt years ago and yet here they are. Odd. _He coughs suddenly to get her attention and she realizes she's probably been too silent for too long and finally she looks up and meets his eyes.

Her heart actually skips a beat.

At first there appears that nobody is actually home.

Just his luck, he thinks, he's been wondering around for an hour and of course nobody is home to help him. At first he wonders if it might not be better to just go and look for Martha – _how hard can it be to find the police station after all – _and come back later. But he's tired and he wants to rest, unpack his stuff; he has no desire to go and wonder around for another hour in search of a police station, he could just wait here until somebody actually shows up. He could also knock on the door and make sure if nobody is really home.

So he does he walks to the door and knocks.

It takes a few minutes but eventually he does hear footsteps and when the door opens it reveals a girl around his age. For second Rick just freezes, she is after all the most beautiful girl he has ever seen. Her brown hair reaches just past her shoulders, but she doesn't seem to notice he is actually standing there, her eyes are distant **–**_ sad he registers quickly – _for a second he wants to ask her if she's alright, if there is something he can do for her, but then he remembers he's a stranger and how weird would that be? At the same time he realizes that they've just been standing there in silence for a while and that is just as strange, maybe he should just come back later.

Softly he coughs to get her attention, willing her silently to smile at him just once.

She looks up and actually smiles at him and for a second he's completely forgotten why he actually came her, but thankfully he remembers before it's embarrassing. _'Hey, I'm here to rent a Caravan?' 'Of course, I'm sorry I'm just a little distracted, please come in. I'll get you the paperwork.' _She guides him to the table tells him to just take a seat and he can't help but wonder what she's actually like. _'Alright I just need some details, just for one person?' 'No it's for two actually.' _A brief expression crosses her face for just a second and then it's gone, so fast that he's never sure it actually past and he'll never be able _'Two?' 'Yeah me and my sister, I think everything has to actually be under her name since I'm just sixteen.' 'Alright you'll need one of the bigger caravans then. I'm going to need your name.' 'I'm Rick.' 'Matilda.'_

She smiles at him and he's grateful he's already sitting because he doesn't think he'd be able to stand.

Maybe he'll like it here more than he first thought he would.

When she returns to her house, after showing him his caravan, she smiles.

It's strange the way she's feeling, she can't quite identify it and yet at the same time she can. It seems like the way she used to feel for Luke, but of course that's just crazy, she has after all just met this guy. He's cute, that much she'll admit, but she loves Luke and she does not like this new guy, Rick, does she? She hopes he'll be a good friend, and she thinks of how nice he had been so maybe he will be, that is if Luke will actually let her be friends with him.

Another knock on the door shakes her from her thoughts, before they go somewhere she doesn't want them to.

First she wonders if Rick has perhaps returned.

Ricks eyes wonder over the small caravan.

For now it will do, he's not entirely sure how long they are actually staying here; but if they stay longer than a few days they could just find somewhere else to stay. His thought keep going back to her though, Matilda and for a second he wonders if she could end up liking a guy like him, but then he dismisses the thought. He's just met her, she's beautiful and kind, but they've just met. He's never believed in love at first sight and he doesn't now, actually he's never believed in love at all. Probably something to do with his father murdering his mother, that could destroy anyone's fate in love he supposes.

But he can't banish her from her thoughts and he hopes that at least they can be friends.

Besides for all he knows she's already taken, a girl as beautiful as her must already have a boyfriend one she loves very much.

He would never have a chance with a girl like her and in the end what does it matter?

He doesn't believe in love after all.

Flowers. Flowers and a simple white card which read '_I'm sorry'._

Maybe an hour ago this would have meant something to her, but now she's not so sure; he had hurt her arm, if only a little, after all. She's not sure if she should forgive him, he could have just been having a bad day, but what if he hadn't? What if this was the man he was turning into? And then there's the cute guy living in Caravan number 22. Right now she's all confused, she can't figure out what it is she's feeling. She loves Luke, has for a long time and she might think RIc is cute but she's sure that doesn't mean anything. Luke has checked out other girls, she's sure.

_Forget today happened – _a voice in her head tells her _– he was just having a bad day, it won't happen again. _

But as she stares at the flowers she realizes something else, he didn't come by himself; he sends her beautiful flowers, but he didn't come himself. He'd scared her and hurt her (a little), but he hadn't deemed it important enough to come by himself to apologize. He'd just send a note and he probably assumed that was it, she'd forget it, they'd just move on.

Flowers, beautiful flowers and a simple white card which read _'I'm sorry.' _

She wonders if he really is sorry or he just wants her to believe that.


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

For the first time in years Martha actually feels peaceful.

She couldn't explain why but she felt like she had finally come home, like some part of her had always been waiting to return, to come back home. She wondered if Rick felt this to or if it was just her, maybe it was because her mom had lived here, maybe it was because she had once lived here. This had been her home for a long time after all. Somehow, sometimes, it still felt like it was; she could remember most of the town and for a second she wonders if her old friends still live here.

For a second she wonders if the old house where her mother died was still here.

For a second, as she looks at the beach, she swears she can see them there; her mother, just as beautiful as she remembers holding her baby brother, her father running towards them and she is there building a sandcastle. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, she's fought hard to remember her mother and forget her father that she has actually forgotten that those happy family moments had once actually existed. She didn't want to remember that after all, not after she had walked away from her father and learned the truth, not since her whole world fell apart. She hasn't thought about that part of her father in fifteen years.

She might find her answers here but she'll have to remember things she has almost forgotten.

Things she wishes would stay buried.

He's a police officer, here to serve and protect and apparently babysit phones.

These were the days, after long boring hours, that he wonders why he didn't just listen to his father and go into the family company, these are the days he wants to forget his dreams and run away from the boredom. Because here he was, Constable Holden, waiting for a phone to ring; begging someone would get into enough trouble to actually need the police. Nothing to serious, because since he's alone again at the moment, he wouldn't be able to help anyone, _because he can't actually leave_, which would be annoying if something serious actually happen, maybe he should point out to Roy it might be better to leave two (maybe three) people behind.

In the end the phones don't ring but the next best thing happens, the door opens.

The door opens and she walks in and when their eyes meet and for a second he swears the world stops turning, he's never seen her before – _he would definitely remember that – _so she must not be from Summer Bay. She has the most beautiful eyes, much more beautiful and kind than Katie's had been and for a brief second he doesn't actually move. Then he remembers he's a cop, here to serve and protect – _and babysit phones, not that he would tell her that part – _and this is a police station so she might need actual help.

'_Can I help you, miss?'_

'_Yeah I'm looking for Roy, I called yesterday and he told me he'd be here.'_

Jack recognizes her voice instantly, it was the same person who had called yesterday, the one he'd spend some time thinking about. He'd thought she might be his girlfriend, but for that she is far too young, she's more his age anyway. For a second he wonders if she might be his daughter but then he remembered that when he asked the others had told him Roy didn't have children – _which is probably for the best, because falling in love and dating the bosses daughter seemed like an incredibly bad idea – _so she was probably just a family friend.

'_Detective Hanson stepped out for a moment but he'll be back any minute now, would you like to wait for him?'_

She smiles and he knows there is no prettier smile out there, he would have noticed her before so he's never met her, definitely more beautiful than Katie, definitely. And yet there is something distinctly familiar about her, as if somewhere, somehow, he has seen her before, but he doesn't know where.

'_Sure, he won't be long right?' 'No, no he'll definitely be back any minute, just take a seat over here. Would you like a soda or something?'_

'_Yes, thank you.' _

So there he goes off to get her a soda and he leaves the damn phones unattended.

No matter, it's not like anyone calls anyway.

The town itself had changed a lot.

Then again fifteen years had passed so this was not so strange and yet it had taken her almost no time to find the police station, only for about ten minutes and she hopes that Rick has found his way to the caravan park. She resists the urge to go and find him, he is after all sixteen he's not a child anymore, he can take care of himself. Besides this is Summer Bay, how lost can anybody really get?

The town might have changed but the police station had not, at least not since she had been here last.

_She was six and terrified, the nice man had taken her away from her home put her in her car and brought her here. He'd even let her hold her baby brother in the car, which her parents had never let her do before, he'd let her play with the siren. But then he'd brought here, to this strange place, and left here promising he would be right back. Now she was alone and scared and all she wanted was her mommy and her daddy, she didn't understand what was going on. So she began to cry, then he was suddenly there again (Roy that is) holding a soda and offering it to her in an attempt to make her stop crying. 'Where's my mommy? I want my mommy!' He'd just looked at her, sad, but he never said a word, like he didn't want to answer her question. _

The police station itself hadn't changed but the people in it had.

He was the only one inside, young about her age, brown hair and the most gorgeous brown eyes ever, her hearts stops beating and she wonders if he in any way feels this feeling. She recognizes his voice instantly from her phone call yesterday, searching trough her thoughts she came up with a name _Constable Holden_, maybe there would be something good in Summer Bay after all. After all not all love stories end like her mothers.

At least she hopes they don't.

After he brought her the soda they had talked.

He'd forgotten all about the boredom and the phones by then, only interested in her at that point, most importantly – _at first – _her name. Then he asked where she was from and he realized he was right, she really wasn't from around here. But when he asks her name she hesitates, for just a second as if she almost doesn't want to tell him, but she does.

'_Martha…Mackenzie.' _

And then before they can go on, before an actual conversation can take place, the phone actually rings. Typical he thinks as he goes to pick it up, when he's alone and bored out of his mind, when he's praying something actually happens, the phones will never ring. But when there is someone here he wants to get to know the damn phone rings.

These are the moments he definitely hates being the new guy.

For a second, after he asks for her name, she hesitates.

It's never been easy for her to answer these questions, should she give him her father's name? Was he somehow, even after she stopped loving him, still a part of her? She didn't want him to be, she wanted to forget he had ever been there, but of course it wasn't that easy. At some point, she can't remember when, she began to use her mother's maiden name; she spend her time erasing every single aspect of her father from her life and now she has to walk the path all over again. But then she answers because in the end she has nothing to feel ashamed of, nothing at all.

When the phone rings she's actually annoyed at the person in need and she can tell he is to.

Then Roy arrives and smiles at her and she follows him into his office, briefly turning around for a second to smile once more at Constable Holden before she disappears from his sight and he smiles back at her.

She hopes that it won't be the last time they talk or that she has a chance to see that smile.


End file.
